Hannah’s Baby Gift Set ~ October 11, 2007

I suppose it’s time to get a little personal. This is my “journal” of sorts, so I guess it’s ok to put it all out there, right? This gift set brings back a lot of deep and sad memories for me. 2007 was one of the hardest years of my life. We started out the year by miscarrying our first baby in January. We had been blessed at that point to have 2 beautiful children, a boy and a girl, and so we tried to take that loss in stride, as much as could be possible. We tried to focus on the blessings we did have and feel grateful for our life as it was. I was very early into the pregnancy and so we grieved the little life we would never meet and we moved forward. 

We did make a small addition to our family in June 2007. Her name was Ruby. She was the “little sister” to our Lab Mix, Maximus. For anyone familiar with the cartoons that were popular at that time, we had our own little Max and Ruby duo, and they were 2 of the best dogs you could ask for. 

We found out in July 2007 that we were expecting again. 

The picture above was taken about a week before we found out that we would not meet this baby outside of heaven, either. The heartbreak from this second loss was overwhelming. The type of grief that comes with a miscarriage, over a person you never actually got to meet, is not something that can easily be explained. It’s confusing to process and it’s a very lonely type of grief. 

My amazing mother knew I was hurting and in a very low place. She knew I had just started trying to relearn how to crochet and teach myself the craft she had tried to teach me as a little girl. I don’t  remember exactly where she purchased everything, but she bought me the motherload of crochet supplies. Everything you could dream: a bag and hooks and yarn and all sorts of goodies to get me kickstarted and give me something to focus on outside of the baby we had just lost. 

My very dear friend, Sara, had been suffering her own personal journey of loss at this time as well. She, however, had lost multiple babies and had yet to have a successful pregnancy. It was at this time that she had finally made it to the point in her pregnancy that we could throw her a baby shower. I took the tools my mama had sent me and used making this baby gift set for the little miracle of Hannah coming as a therapy of sorts to work through my own sadness. 

It was the first time that I would ever make any of these items (except the bear of course, which was the same bear pattern I had made Matthew for Valentine’s Day). 

This bootie pattern was from the book Baby Layettes and Afghans by LeisureArts. It was part of the Lacy-Soft Layette set.

The sweater pattern is The Sweet Baby Hoodie Crochet Pattern by Bernat